Today I decided I would walk in the woods, well aware of that the former skiing tracks I walk on the side of, would have turned into slippery ice during the mild weekend.
I thought it would be a good mindfulness exercise anyway, which it always is, cycling or walking on ice or packed snow. We northerners know.
During the walk, I noticed I sometimes let go of the presence and the awareness, to let my eyes go ahead and look a few meters in front of me. I immediately lost balance. I lost balance every time I let my eyes, and my mind with them, go ahead.
So I learned, or remembered rather, that on very slippery ice (yes, there are different kinds of slipperiness to ice), I better keep my mind and eyes very close to where I am, very close to where my body is.
The long term goal, my valued direction, is still there anyway, I just have to have faith and know I’m slowly moving in the right direction. Moving towards where I want to move.
I realised, it is the same in life. My walk on the ice is a metaphor for something bigger.
Right now, I’m in a place where I have the big picture, my valued direction, my vision and my big goals, but I don’t have a clue what the steps on the way there, look like.
Eager as I can be, I want to know the steps, see them. So I’m searching, looking around, using my mind to try to fill the gap of the unknown. And doing that, not being present and filled with trust, I lose balance.
I accepted not seeing the whole stair case. Had trust to take the first step anyway. And then the next. And the next.
I realise there has to be a balance between that I know I’m facing my vision, I’m walking in the right direction, and just looking down right where I am now, taking the very small steps, make a move, however small.
I then can let go of trying to see the end of the stair way, having trust and faith in that this is at least the right direction.